Crabby   Leave a comment

Look out, everybody! I’m gonna be crabby for the rest of the day! – Lucy van Pelt

Although I wasn’t intending to continue with the Peanuts theme from my last post, I find I have been channeling my inner Lucy van Pelt over the past few days. Remember Lucy? The girl in the blue dress who pulled Charlie Brown’s football away just as he was about to kick it? Every. Single. Time. The girl who sat behind a desk dispensing advice for a nickel a problem? The girl who was perpetually crabby?

Yeah, her. Now you’ve got it. Well right now, that’s me. There are neither enough pieces of dark chocolate or scoops of ice cream or oatmeal butterscotch cookies (don’t judge) in the world to make me feel better, nor are there enough endorphins in existence to lift my mood. (I tried exercise first because, you know, even if I’m crabby I’m trying to fit back into my regular wardrobe. No dice. The oatmeal cookie I had with lunch didn’t do it either. And, yes, it was a singular cookie. See previous sentence about the wardrobe.)

The similarities are astounding. While I don’t pull footballs away from consistently gullible unsuspecting field goal kickers – with my lack of depth perception, this could be dangerously stupid – I do wear a lot of blue, even if not usually dresses, and have a thing for guys who play the piano. Each day at work I sit behind a desk dispensing answers which could occasionally be construed as advice – like, “Well, if you want to lose all the work you’ve been doing for the last hour, then you could hit the delete button. But, maybe hitting the print button instead would be a better idea.” – although very few people have ever offered to pay me for these pearls of wisdom. And, today at least, I feel perpetually crabby. Perpetually as in I always have been and always will be.

And, predictably, it’s making me more crabby.

I don’t like feeling like this, as if everyone and everything is making me angry or irritated. I have tried focusing on the good things in my life – I’m healthy, gainfully, employed, have a great kid, etc. – trying to ‘Mary-freaking-sunshine’ my way to equilibrium. Again, no dice. It’s like even though intellectually I get my life isn’t as annoying as it feels right now, my emotions would prefer my intellect take a flying leap. And then pass the chocolate.

Could it be the depression talking? It’s could. Could it be the realization I’m coming up both on three years of being single – with no indications of my ‘relationship status’ changing any time in the near (or far) future – as well as the fact that this September would have been my twenty-fifth wedding anniversary? Anything is possible. Is it more likely the fact it’s early spring, and it has been cold and rainy for the last stinking week? G-d, yes. I am so sick of this weather, it’s not even funny. Please, someone send the sun back!

Grumble, grumble, grumble.

Don’t get me wrong. I like New England and have no intention of giving up its beauties and multiple seasons for the sunny monotony of some place like southern California. (My apologies if you live in and love the sunny monotony of some place like southern California; crabby or not, I’m not trying to offend, just make a point.) I just don’t do well in the monotony of gray, dripping skies. They make me, well, crabby.

And the forecast calls for it to continue for at least the next four days. I may have to invest in Ben and Jerry’s stock.

So, if you’re in the mood for some snark over the next few days, feel free to send me a message. I have a feeling it’s going to be available in abundance.

In the meantime, or until the sun comes out again, I’m just going to sit here with this football and wait for some round-headed kid to come by and want to kick it.


Posted May 4, 2016 by wordsaremylife in random thoughts

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